Bob Dylan

Last night I went to see Bob Dylan and Merle Haggard at the Beacon Theatre. It was awesome. Bob is always awesome. I generally go by myself to his shows for the same reason I go to Star Wars movies by myself...because I don't want anyone along to harsh my mellow. I don't want to hear how bored someone is, or how overpriced it was, or even worry about whether they're thinking it and not saying anything. I just want to sit and stare with rapt attention and leave glowing. Maybe cry a little. No harm, no foul. On this tour Dylan is playing a keyboard and harmonica instead of the guitar, which is new and different. As always he is old and sagging but he's still riveting to me. I found myself just staring through my binoculars nearly the whole time, even between songs when I should have been clapping, just to see him go to the side and blow his nose (heaven!) and shuffle his feet and wave his hands around, spry and skipping. And in the dark, from behind, he became his younger self again.

The cool thing about his concerts is that he remakes his songs every year. It never sounds the same as the record, usually not even close. There are just (most of) the lyrics and some of the motifs of the music, and the rest is largely transformed. The part I don't like about it is when it's transformed into lounge music, but it's his right to do that and I'm sure some people love it. That only happened on two of the songs last night. Most of it was loud and rocking. He never did pick up the guitar, though there was one sitting there teasing us. After the encore I was wishing that the band would go offstage and he would pick up the guitar and do an acoustic solo version of "Tomorrow Is A Long Time." No dice though.

The Beacon is pretty small, so even though I was in the front of the rear balcony I was pretty close. I suppose I'll never get closer than I was at the Towson State University Gymnasium in 2000, standing probably ten rows back. I can't believe he even played there, it had those rolling wood bleachers and "1986 Champions" banners and everything. I wholeheartedly recommend that venue.

Merle Haggard was a great opener. Merle Haggard?!? He had a lot of fans in the audience. He had what, eight band members? And who knows what history those guys have seen. Those are some experienced gentlemen there. They had my foot and tap-tap-tapping. They managed to walk the line between slavish traditionalism and the sort of je ne sais quoi that makes today's country too cheesy for my taste. I found the other opener, Amos Lee, cheesy. I wish I could explain why.

Ok well let me know if you want to go to the new Star Wars and not make fun of it and say it was awesome.

grossest thing ever?

I guess I should be happy that I never get cockroaches in my house, I only get what some have colorfully termed "palmetto bugs." Even though they look like massive roaches in every way (except that they fly), supposedly they are a different creature, and for my sanity I have tried to think of them as something innocuous. Like a beetle. I'm not scared or disgusted by beetles, only a little startled sometimes. Why can't I have beetles in my house instead? One gross thing you may have noticed about palmetto/waterbugs is that when you crush them you don't see nice red blood or even goo, you see something like dirty fryer oil coming out of them. That's just gross to me, to think of an animal that circulates oil instead of blood. Though I guess I should feel good about it, the way I feel good about biodiesel. However yesterday morning I saw something you probably have never seen. I was running the bath till the water got hot and then I turned on the shower and opened the curtain to step in but was met with a belly-up waterbug (not doing very well in the water, by the way) flailing around in its death-throes. I feared turning the water off, knowing that they can fly and run really fast, so I stood there deliberating a minute and watching it. Soon it took a shit. It discharged this oily inky substance out its roach butt. Quite a lot of it too. I've heard that humans let out all their intestinal contents when they die, and I guess roaches do too, because that's what happened. It was a new level of gross, it really was.

still more celebs

I guess I saw Amanda Peet or something yesterday morning. I was walking by the Mandarin Oriental Hotel in Columbus Circle and saw these guys pull up in a car on the corner and run in panicked fashion up to the door. I thought they must be elevator repairmen or something. Then I saw them bobbing around staring at a minivan, and they had disposable cameras, and a woman with tons of makeup on was getting out of the van. She gave them an "oh god, yuck" look, which made me think (along with the lo-qual cameras) that they're not paparazzi, just two guys who are unhealthily obsessed with Amanda Peet. Or whoever it was. When I walked by again after my doctor's appointment there was a different guy standing out there with a real camera. Who is so important that photographers need to document every time they go in and out of hotels? I thought maybe Princess Stephanie, but it seem she is not supposed to leave Monaco during her period of mourning. If she did, I guess that really would be news. Or, "news."

more celebs

Well, life goes on. The other day I volunteered to usher at St. Ann's Warehouse for the Wooster Group's production of House/Lights. What you do is, you email this lady at the theater and she gives you a slot as an usher so you can see the play for free. (A $30 value!) The drawbacks are that there's a lot of waiting around and you have to sit in either the back row or in the front row but on a riser instead of a chair. Other than that the work was pretty easy. I would say sign up with a friend, because of all the waiting around. In fact, I was the "friend" in this case. As an usher, I was enlisted to hand out programs. This is sort of a dizzying task...they come in so fast, and not everyone is sure they want what you're giving them, and some people will take them for their companions but then the companions don't know it and want one too, and some people have both hands full...but then! Then you look up and you're handing a program to Laurie Anderson and right after that you hand one to Lou Reed and he says "Thanks" and you're like omigod omigod! They had excellent seats, obvs.

I liked the play, I guess. It was sort of hypnotic. Excellently choreographed. There was a lot of need for perfect timing between the sound and the movements and the video and the players with each other. It was sort of more like a dance performance. What was the story? I'm not sure. Was it a good play? I don't know. It was a good production, to be sure. The ushers were excellent, especially that girl with the programs, really top-drawer.

of overwork

What's been going on is that in an unaccustomed departure from the usual, I have been working constantly while at work. I've even kept working after work was supposed to be over! Quite a few times! And as you may know I have no computer at home; well, none to speak of, so I haven't been blogging.

Oh for christ's sake, here comes another thing I have to work on now...you see what I mean? I had like 10 minutes off.